The literary coo and its procrastinating tail

I always make the best plans. I plan to write more, I plan to procrastinate less and to just get things done and most importantly, I plan to read my calendar properly so I am existing in the right week. Two out of three isn’t too bad.

This week has been a spectacular case of planning mishaps. I have known for a very long time that there are four writing submissions I need to prepare for September.

Cries of ‘I’ve got plenty of time’ and the old chestnut ‘I’ll just do this one thing first and then I’ll get on’ fill the air. It’s fair to say I misjudged it all.

August and September have been busy.  My son started high school, I have a new part-time job, so perhaps my mind hasn’t been as focused as it should’ve been….

Deadline 1 was missed. Gone. Sent away on its holidays never to return again.

Deadlines 2, 3 and 4 were still achievable, just. For some reason my irrational conscious thought it would be a great idea to not worry about these three too much. The 30th September is AGES away it blatantly lied.

Before I knew it, it’s Monday 25th September and I have four days, preferably three (to take into account a snail mail submission) to complete everything.

The emergency family meeting commenced with the words ‘I’ve mucked it all up. I’ll be at the dining table if you need me. As you were’. Hatches were battened down, drawbridges were in the up position and every other metaphor for DO NOT DISTURB was mentioned.

There is a saying where I live about being the last to do anything – the coo’s tail. I can now raise my hand and say, yes, that relates to me. I am the literary coo and I have a procrastinating tail.

In two days I have managed to successfully (in my eyes, the proof will be in the pudding) edit 4000 words, prepare a 500 word synopsis, a 1 page synopsis, edit 600 words, a pitch, edit 2500 words, a writing CV, a 200 word personal statement, a 300 word summary and drink 9/10/11… cups of tea. There were no partridges or pear trees involved in the making of this delusional post.

Never, ever again.

Yes, it can be done. I am living, sleepy, bedraggled proof of that. But don’t do it my way. Channel your inner scout/guide motto – be prepared.